I don't like being used

Have you experienced waking up one morning and suddenly a person you have been treating as a friend just turns out not talking to you anymore? Whether you have or not, it is saddening. It is sad when people make friends, or in proper words, befriend you because they just need something from you. It is injustice to friendship. It is immature. It is selfish.

One aspect of insensitivity is utilitarianism. This attitude lacks the proper virtues necessary to see that each person is not merely an object of one's pleasure but as subjects of relationships. The great John Paul II while still a prelate of Poland once wrote in a book he entitled Love and Responsibility (1960) commented how persons should not be treated as things which we just use and leave away afterwards; sounds like saying, no strings attached. He pointed out that “A person's rightful due is to be treated as an object of love, not as an object for use.” People are meant to be loved and not used.

Care, trust, and love - these are some of the essential parts in keeping a good friendship alive. They are not ideas floating in thin air but attitudes and expressions that needed to be acted upon. The insensitivity of utilitarianism stems from a frightening ego, one that devours even the wholeness of the person. When we allow ourselves to be pampered so much, when we always think we can get what we want, when we feel that all eyes are on us as if we are always the star of the show - this is ego.

This morning His Excellency Bishop Famadico celebrated Mass for us in honor of Sts. Cosmas and Damian. He reiterated the value and essence of having a relationship with Jesus. He repeatedly challenged us to know the Lord through a meditative question, "Who are You, Jesus?" It is a challenge because this question can be answered by academic research, by reading the scriptures, articles, books, etc. but the key to knowing who He really is is through a personal encounter, a relationship. The Bishop also reminded us of our commitment to the Lord. He said, "How could you commit to someone you do not know?" and this ignited our hearts to really encounter the Lord. Friendship is a person to person relationship and unless we know nothing of the other person, we would not have a real commitment because "friendship is not developed from information from others." Lastly he noted that will power to create friendship is not enough, it also requires the grace of God and one's openness and trust.

We meet different people daily and everyone is not expected to be a close friend of us. The challenge is how we look at them and deal with them. A smile is not bad. A simple "Hi!" or "Good morning" would not be a burden.

CBCP NEWS: Leave the 'selfie' mindset, go back to God

A headline in the CBCP's website reads
Leave the 'selfie' mindset, go back to God
Here's a repost of the news:
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MANILA, Sept. 23, 2013—An excess of ‘selfie’ photos may not just be a symptom of selfishness, but may show a need to go back to God, a prelate said. 

“We are selfish, this is what we need to do away with. [It's all about] I, me, myself [like] those who keep on taking selfie photos,” Novaliches Bishop Emeritus Teodoro Bacani, Jr. said in a homily to some 2,000 people gathered to see the international pilgrim image of Our Lady of Fatima, Portugal last Wednesday. 

This kind of mindset is reflected in the social media phenomenon of the ‘selfie’ photo, a self-taken picture made possible by front-facing cameras, according to Bishop Bacani. 

All taking, no giving 

“I joked some people, telling them, ‘You’re all about picture-taking, but never about picture-giving.’ This is the world today, it’s all about taking,” he said. 

In an intended pun, Bacani said this selfishness is evident even in the halls of political power, saying, “If by any chance, you don’t take pictures yourself, you take from the pork barrel instead.” 

According to Bacani, this shows an unnatural self-centeredness in the “smallest to the most powerful” in society — with 90 million selfie photos posted on Instagram alone, this does not seem hard to believe. 

Talking about a topic that seemed to strike a chord with many of the faithful, he said, this phenomenon also reveals a culture that needs God more than ever before. 

“What God wants to say is, ‘Leave your selfishness.’ This is what you need to leave and live in God instead because in God is true peace,” Bacani said during a 9 a.m. mass at the San Fernande De Dilao Parish, Paco in honor of the visit of the Our Lady of Fatima, Portugal image. 

Penance, a return to God 

He explained that this return to God or repentance is part of the message Our Lady gave to three children in Fatima, Portugal in 1917. 

“The original meaning of penance is to return to God,” Bacani said, dispelling widely-held notions that penance is about extreme physical mortifications like self-inflicted pain. 

Together with prayer, penance forms a formula of sorts for lasting peace, he explained. 

The image of Our Lady of Fatima, Portugal is on pilgrimage in the Philippines until December 18, 2013 and is currently in the Diocese of Pasig.

Chief Pastor admonishes co-shepherds

Pope Francis addresses 120 new bishops on September 19 urging them to be more pastoral than living a "princely" lifestyle.